Roving Reporter of the New Testament Church 2 is a continuation of the earlier episode. Click here to read the previous episode. Towards the end of the earlier episode, we saw the sisters rushing into the pastor’s kitchen and carrying the cooler loaded with food to the Hotel. The menu is extensive and is loaded according to the choice of these special pastors.
The Pastor’s Kitchen Rules
We know that the ZION stomach cannot digest the New Jerusalem food. The Joy of the whole earth cannot be having parties with the lesser joyful ones. A little bit of digging provided us with the following information.
- Each Pastor has his own special favourites and exclusive menu needs to be served.
- Therefore, the kitchen sisters need to slog throughout the day to ensure that everybody is happy for their Breakfast, Soups, Lunch, Snacks and Dinner.
- The menu of the pastors is fixed well ahead of time by consultation with the Main cooking sisters of Chennai(led by Kumari). Even the very minutest details are not missed. They cannot afford to incur the wrath of the Chiefs.
- Based on the above menu, the shopping is done to procure the best masalas and meat to cook for the taste of the Holy Men in White.
- The premises of The Pastor’s Kitchen are strictly forbidden for the “BELIEVERS”. They should not “STUMBLE” seeing this exclusive preparation and start comparing with the generic throwaway served to them.
- Some believers who volunteer to work in the pastor’s kitchen are discouraged and kept away as they might spill the beans.
Slight displeasure by any of these VIPs will cause a tornado in the kitchen. We will showcase one such tornado in a later episode.
Why the Hotel?
It’s quite common for anybody to think why does the chief need to stay in a hotel and not be put up with the other pastors? Why are they so desperate to show themselves as the bosses of these other white clads and remain separated, elusive and elevated from others? A thinking person will get the answers. If you haven’t understood it yet, please read our main scripture portion, again.
But Jesus Called Them To Himself And Said, “You Know That The Rulers Of The Gentiles Lord It Over Them, And Those Who Are Great Exercise Authority Over Them. 26 YET IT SHALL NOT BE SO AMONG YOU; But Whoever Desires To Become Great Among You, Let Him Be Your Servant.Matt 20:25-26
When we reached the hotel, we could see a coterie of SERVANTS to the SERVANTS of God exclusively guarding the area. One of them was so exhausted that he was sleeping on the holy couch of one of the chiefs with his mouth opened. When he saw that the dinner crew had arrived, he jumped to his feet and sheepishly tried to help out. In the back of his mind, he was worried if his lack of so-called sincerity will be reported back.
The Lobbying Technique
We know that most countries have their Lobby groups in the Capitol Hill, The White House and the Pentagon. The purpose of a Lobby group is to work for the interests of the countries they represent. These lobby groups are paid handsomely by the countries and part of these payments reach the officials who finally put forth the recommendations to the US Government. This is a form of bribery, however, it’s wrapped in a nice covering called “Lobbying”.
When the handmaidens of the Chiefs were laying the tables, we got hold of one of the friendly insider and wanted to know more about this hotel stay. Our conversation went something as follows. Let’s call this insider Bro Ben.
Reporter: Hi Brother, are you the one responsible for all these hotel facilities for the chiefs?
Bro Ben: Oh no, I came here as I was sent by Pastor Jose Mateo to see how things are going on.
Reporter: Oh Ok..So Pastor Jose Mateo is the one officially in charge of the Chief’s accommodation?
Bro Ben: Don’t tell anybody that I told you. It’s Pastor Jose Mateo who is sponsoring the Hotel from his own pocket(local faith home funds). He does this contrary to the counsel of the board workers. Therefore, he also can get a suite along with the chiefs in the Hotel.
Reporter: Oh so that’s how it works. Don’t worry, your back is safe.
Bro Ben: By getting the Chiefs close to him in the Hotel, he is also able to get them out of the influence of other pastors. Being in a controlled environment, he can keep tabs on everything that is happening. He is able to use this proximity to lobby for himself and his plans. As a plus, he is also entitled to the other privileges that is exclusive to the chiefs.
Reporter: Oh I see it now. Its the Jose Mateo Lobby. Very strategic of him. Benefits of Buttering.
While the Holy Triune(Chief, Dy Chief, Jose) are awaited and their luxurious suites are arranged, let us conclude this episode with some salient features of the Lobbying Jose.
- Technically speaking, he is LAZY and a GLUTTON. He loves to boss around the little guys that serve him in the name of TRAINING. He is supposed to be the TRAINER.
- He makes the trainee brothers make his bed, fix his tea, vacuum his room three times a day.
- He even uses 3 soaps to bathe. One for the face, one for the body, and one for the feet. And the brothers have to set it in the exact same order in the bathtub.
- They have to stand like soldiers next to him while he eats.
- He gets his clothes washed & ironed by them.
- He is even worse than Pas Calland Wrong because he would torture them mentally if they miss anything.
- The brothers had to wash the cars every Thursday even if it was not a car being used or dirty. They had to take out every single mat & clean the insides thoroughly even if it was not dirty. They wasted so much time & energy doing such useless things. REMEMBER THAT NEWARK HAD 10 CARS.
- Pas Jose Mateo was a strict taskmaster, even with the sisters. He got angry with the sisters if the curry is not perfect. He put the sisters also in a regimented schedule, while he stayed in his room.
- He slept 3 hours in the afternoon after his grand lunch & went to visits in the rich believers home only and continue with his night feasting.
- He does not like to visit the Spanish folks. His choice visiting spots were the houses of the Rich Malayalees.
End of “Roving Reporter of the New Testament Church 2“
Series to be continued.